WHAT THE WATERS LEFT BEHIND – SCARS

Billy Bob’s screamo punk band The Ravens – they stole the name from our Cure cover band, the bastards! – is going places. They’re moving from the middle of nowhere across no man’s land to yet another dingy shithole bar in the Argentinian desert. But hey, at least there’s free beer if you don’t mind the dirty mugs for the one concert out of five they actually get paid for! More importantly, it gives Billy a chance to pick up punk chicks with a leather fixation and tonight he’s about to get lucky with Carla, the local Lara Croft. She not only invites Billy but the whole band to stay over at her place. Clean beds and a hot shower instead of a smelly tour bus? Yes please! It’s just a few miles ahead, at Epecuén. Which might ring a bell if you’re a wellness geek – and well, who isn’t? – as it’s a former spa resort famed for its healing water… that ironically got flooded by massive loads of water, turning it into a ghost town. An Argentinian Atlantis, with no inhabitants… except for Carla and her cozy family of degenerate inbreds! And whaddayaknow, they were already greasing up their asado grills, the only thing missing was the meat… Great fun is to be had with this second installment of what is hence a WHAT THE WATERS LEFT BEHIND saga for lovers of red meat, bad taste, TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (and especially its sequel) and traditional family dinners. Plus, you’ll be the first to savor it, as it’s a BIFFF world premiere!